I just made out with a guy for $7.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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