"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
