Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
