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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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