Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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