Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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