we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
