Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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