Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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