I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
