Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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