STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
