We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
