theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize