I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
