Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
