Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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