Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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