I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
