Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
