somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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