a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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