i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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