im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize
