i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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