I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
