I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I have fence marks all over my body
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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