She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
