I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize
