When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Why are your pants in the freezer?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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