Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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