What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
