plz talk dirty to me
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize