try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
