Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Randomize
