nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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