If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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