How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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