I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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