fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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