Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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