She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
