Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
