If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
