Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize