Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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