I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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