Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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