That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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