i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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