So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
