I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We're not piercing ourselves today.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize